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Month: November 2017

Expressing Empathy: Part 2

Expressing Empathy: Part 2

Empathy in Patient/Doctor Relationships

*Names have been changed to protect privacy.*

Carl Patterson was with his elderly stepfather when he died from acute lymphatic leukemia. Tom had been a laid-back, easy going man who made friends easily and preferred to have a glass of wine than worry about small details. Carl, on the other hand, was detail-oriented and had been looking after his stepfather’s affairs for years.

Tom wanted to donate his body to a local university for medical research. In most cases, if a body is not received promptly after death, research organizations will refuse the donation. Carl knew this. So he grew impatient when hours passed after his stepfather died and the doctor, who needed to process the paperwork to release Tom’s body, didn’t appear. Carl repeatedly questioned the nurses. The nurses repeatedly paged the doctor. When she arrived, the doctor told Carl, “I have more important things to do with the living than with the dead.” Carl was stunned. “He had just died,” he said. “Her bedside manner didn’t exist.”

Numerous studies have found that empathy is often missing in doctor-patient communication. Expressing empathy can be even more difficult in situations involving conflict, anger, sadness or fear. These feelings are common on a cancer journey.  When medical professionals show empathy, patients feel more satisfied with the relationship. They also have more trust in their doctor, are less anxious about their condition, and are more likely to follow the doctor’s recommendations. Doctors feel better about their work too. Empathy is a learnable skill being taught more frequently in medical schools to help improve patient-doctor communication.

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Expressing Empathy: Part 1

Expressing Empathy: Part 1

“Empathy is really the opposite of spiritual meanness. It’s the capacity to understand that every war is both won and lost. And that someone else’s pain is as meaningful as your own.” – Barbara Kingsolver, author.

Katrine Bellamy thinks this story is funny. It’s the story of how people sometimes react when they hear about cancer. Katrine and her neighbor took turns walking the kids to and from school. But, on the day she learned her 9-year-old son had a brain tumor, she asked her neighbor to pick up the children. When Katrine arrived home, she saw her neighbor standing in the driveway, waiting for her. “She literally collapsed in my arms,” said Katrine. The distraught women cried as Katrine reassured her that everything would be alright. Katrine needed a friend who would listen. She ended up helping her friends cope with the news instead.

This is an article about empathy. It is easy to misunderstand the difference between sympathy and empathy. When you have sympathy you have compassion for another person and acknowledge their hardship. Empathy is when you understand and feel another person’s feelings for yourself; it is a mutual experience of feeling. With empathy you “put yourself in their shoes.”

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